I’ve been listening to Mary Mary’s song Catch Me for days now. Its message, coupled with Rev. TJ Roberson’s sermon (It’s Already Done, Matthew 9:22) from Sunday, are what inspired and gave me peace about a few things that have been troubling me for a while now. Has God promised you something and it just seems like it is not ever going to come to pass?? That’s where I am right now. To know me personally is that two of my biggest challenges are maintaining my relationship with Christ (I don’t want anything to interfere with me and my first love!), and guys. I have the worst…and I mean WORST hand with those I’ve picked, and those who’ve picked me. I almost want to get a shirt made that says…
Guys…You need not apply if… 1. You have a girlfriend, boyfriend, or wife.
2. You spend more time in the streets than in Church.
3. You have several children by several different women.
4. You spend the majority of your time with the boys, but ironically have none when it comes to me.
5. You know you are unqualified, and aren’t looking to improve.
When I run into situations like these, it is those times that HE (Jesus) catches me, and reminds me that it's already done, and also that I need not settle. Right before I get caught up in the whys and how’s of things, He catches me. If truth be told, He caught me over 2,000 years ago on a hill called Calvary, but that’s a whole ‘nother note. : ) One of my biggest concerns is who I’ll marry, but listening to Rev. preach last Sunday about things already being done, gave me peace about it. I used to think something was wrong with me, but I know better now. I am a part of a chosen generation…a royal priesthood. I need my believing friends to pray mightily for me. I speak holiness and purity over my life. I’m praying my husband has traveling grace on his way to me. I also pray that He is all that I have prayed for. I know that God has my best interest at heart, and that is why he has kept me from all of these potential calamities in the form of relationships. He’ll let me get just close enough to see that what I thought I wanted wasn’t all that it appeared to be. To give you an illustration of what I mean, I was at Wal*Mart Sunday and I saw a guy that I just knew was going to be “The 1” a few years back. When I saw him I almost immediately dropped my head, started laughing, and asked myself, "What were you thinking??" I was smitten with him because He was about 4 or 5 years older, had a nice car (which happened to be my favorite color and model at the time), He always put money and Church, and always had a Bible. Now that I look back, I don’t even know it the Bible that He had was his or not. Little did I know, He was not who I thought He was, or even who I hoped he’d be. God allowed me to see this from the very first time we talked, and when He gave me his cell number (to take the place of his Mother’s house phone number) (RED FLAG!!!), I wrote it down with my finger in the air. I don’t want any seat fillers, users, pretenders, or overall fakes. I’ve been in so many one sided situations in which I do most of everything and nothing is truly reciprocated that I’ve become very cautious and careful when it comes to matters of the heart. I am much more careful now than I have ever been in the past. I am one who journals and I could have written this (as I have many other entries) in my journal, but I chose to publish it here in hopes of encouraging someone who may share some of my sentiments. Know that God has NOT forgotten about you, and that He is still able to meet every single need that you have. :) Never give up hope! Never give up on God. Be Encouraged! Don't get tired of doing what is right because in due season, you will reap what God has for you. Don't stand in the way of your blessings. Let God be God over all of the intricate details as well as the big issues as well. I love you, and I pray that God blesses and keeps you always! :) When you feel yourself slipping, just look towards Heaven and say, "...Catch Me..."
